It’s been a while since I posted on this blog, but I finally got the password all figured out. Thanks Gabe Ripley!! I plan to update everyone on my family and basically post whatever comes to mind here.
Every month or so, I wish it was that frequent, I update my Linkedin, Facebook and other social networks with new contacts. It has been about 6 months since I did this last, so on a lazy Labor Day I decided to export my contacts and update my social networks. Maybe there is a way to do this more efficiently, but I just wanted to get it done.
It had really been a while since I did this and so I had 499 contacts in Linkedin that I hadn’t reached out to. I was excited to reconnect with some individuals and add them to my network. Starting a few moments after I sent my invites I received notification of lots of people accepting my invite. Thanks to all of you for reconnecting.
One person, let’s call him Brian, chose to not only reject my invite but to let me know why. I do appreciate knowing why they chose not to accept my invite, but the reason was upsetting. In Linkedin you can designate an Amazon reading list. I updated it recently with a few books I have read, The Forgotten Man and Common Sense, by Glenn Beck. That second book was why this gentlemen chose not to accept my connection invitation. “Any fan of Glenn Beck I have nothing in common with”.
My first reaction was to dismiss it and move on. But then I thought that this was the exact thing that is happening with the country. We are so focused on hating the other side of any political issue that we demonize them, both the repubs and the dems do this very effectively. So I chose not to participate in that. I sent, what I hoped was a professional and “reaching over the aisle” type of email. I’ll let you decide if it was snarky or not:
Brian,
I contacted you not because of any shared or potentially shared political beliefs, I tend to leave them out of my business relationships, but because we worked together in some capacity in your capacity at (website removed). I believe that is your site, or that you are associated with.
Do you only work with those that share your political beliefs? Not that I do or I don’t. I don’t wish or intend to get into a political debate, but I do know that I work with and share friendships with many people who wouldn’t read a Glenn Beck book and know that I would, but somehow those relationships still work 
I hope you have a wonderful day and reconsider my invite. It is our commonalities that bring us together, not our differences. Have a wonderful evening and a great week!
I meant it as a friendly email to point out that we don’t have to agree politically, but since we actually worked together, me as an affiliate manager, he as an affiliate, there was definitely a reason for us to connect. Oh well.
Brian, if you are reading this, I bet you and I have a lot in common. Hey, I’m in Sales and Marketing and so are you. I’m in ecommerce, and so are you. I have managed vendor relationships in the past, and your profile indicates you do to. I bet you are a pretty cool guy, and ya know what, my wife thinks I am
I honestly do have close relationships with people who have vastly different views. They know where I stand, I know where they stand and at times the only debates that I have that really matter are with those individuals. Our commonalities bring us together and our differences make the sum of our parts way better then the parts themselves. I cherish those relationships. We’ve stopped doing that. We can’t just hang around with people who share every belief we do, how boring is that.
Jamie
8 Users Response In This Post
Jamie,
You’ve absolutely nailed it. Like we talked about over the weekend, it’s all partisan B.S. from both sides these days. I wasn’t familiar with the book so I checked it out on Amazon. Of 954 reviews it received 626 “5 star” ratings, 214 “1 star” ratings, and 57 “4 star” ratings. I think that helps illustrate the divide. Brian, I’ve known Jamie for about a year now. I didn’t even know his political slant for the first 3 or 4 months that I knew him. I just moved from San Francisco (where I was way right of the norm) to Spokane (where I’m way left of the norm) and we’ve become good friends regardless of our political differences. Though it was recently noted the I didn’t eat any of my potatoes and he didn’t eat his aparagus. You know, Brian… that might be the deal breaker. There is no way I’m gonna associate with an asparagus hating jerk.
Dude, if I only knew how much you hated potatoes, we would have left way earlier lol
I think you actually put it in better perspective than I did Big Dog. I’m sure that “Brian” has a few friends that read that book or eat asparagus and he doesn’t even know.
Absolutely no response. I wonder what he is going to do when he wants to work with one of my merchants. Maybe then my reading list won’t be such a big deal. So sad, I’m sure he is a great guy, and I know I’m not all that bad
We really have to get beyond this “i hate dems” and “I hate republicans”. Those two parties have put this mentality in place to wedge us apart. The more we focus on how the other is wrong, the more we lose our country.
I’m willing to bet that on many issues we agree. Sad.
Jamie, while you have never told me your political views in the 7 years (YIKES!) we’ve known each other and worked together, I knew you were a gun-toting chick from the first time I heard you were Jamie of CWC in Idaho. Then I found out you were a gun-toting dude.
What you wrote is enough to make anyone a centrist. It’s a good thing I already am. I would gladly call myself a Democrat or Republican if either party were fiscally conservative and socially liberal. Both parties remain fiscally irresponsible.
-David
Wow, 7 years. Thanks for commenting. Both parties have been fiscally… man irresponsible isn’t even the word…
Makes you think twice about putting stuff on your reading list.
I’m a WW2 buff, so I’ve got a lot of Hitler material, and am also intrigued by religious and national ideology, and particularly the Zionism debate, so I’ve got books on both sides for those.
I’ve read Noam Chomsky in the past just because he’s a decent reporter about all the bad stuff we did, even if his solutions aren’t really that sound. I find that I can learn from people who I don’t agree with. Your linkedin friend clearly has not found this yet.
I’ve also realized that someone’s political compass is more determined by what they think the most important issues are….than, where they stand on all the issues.
For instance, a moderate democrat and a moderate republican who both feel financial aspects of government are the most important are likely to have more in common than a moderate rebublican, and an ideological republican.
So, in this case, republican could be more similar to a democrat than his own party based on his PRIORITIES.
This dude you encountered has clearly made his priorities of ostracising potential business partners clear, and doing nothing to advance the debate, or civility.
As a social scientist, don’t discount the fact that he might expect to lose most of his friends on LinkedIn if he was outed as having a friend who read Glenn Beck. If he was in such a tenuous situation, his behaviour might be understandable.
Well, Jaime, look on the bright side – if you ever do have a change of heart, and want to start a book burning crusade, I think might have made your first contact!
Thanks Matt, I appreciate the comments. “So, in this case, republican could be more similar to a democrat than his own party based on his PRIORITIES. ” – That is exactly what I have found. So many of us are much closer in beliefs for most of the issues than we realize. There are a few I disagree with my close friends, but we know that, discuss it, and move closer to those issues we agree on and feel we can make an impact.
While right wing, Glenn Beck is well within the bounds of regular political opinion and discourse; I share your dismay that someone would react as Brian did. Hopefully this blog entry will encourage others not to act similarly.
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